Calculated life

I was all alone.
Looking to the stars.
I can't see the moon.
Where are u shining ball?

Passing my time.
It's like a circle pit in the head.
What am I thinking about?
Is it you?
Or you?

So, i reach the calculator.
Calculate life.
Can we calculate life?
It's not a poker card,
But it's way better that a poker card.

Then i realize.
I'm not calculating life.
Life is calculating me.

A song for a friend

Hello there, it's been a long time since i posted my last words. Now, here I am again to write u a story about my friend.

I was in my room with him, then suddenly he asked me, "kau nak tau apa masala aku syuk?" Then i said " Mende?, Awek?". " Aku da putus da".

I was speechless. I know that would be damn hurt. And the reason is "Die pegi kat mamat hari tulah"

Chill dude, we're all you need. You don't need 'goodbye' from her. You only need 'goodluck' from us :)

P/s : saja tulis bwat sedap mmbe2 aku suh layan blog balik.

LIVE LIFE, we are FRIENDS till DEATH

Again, I've read words from my friends blog. Mostly, they talked bout friends. Sometimes, this is the reason why they wrote blogs.

FRIENDS are the most important things in life after family. We can't live without friends. Even though there's some people can survive that, but they're fucking insane. They don't really survive actually, they're dead. Because the don't have life. Because life is meaningless without friends. If you have friends, ask yourself again, How many of them are really your PURE friends? Then, how many of them are your BEST friends? I know it sounds pointless, but think again, what is the criteria to be your FRIENDS, what did they do until you called them PURE friends, why they are your BEST friends? For me, it depends on how bad you really need them to LIVE this little dangeradvanturehazardous short word called LIFE.

*p/s. categorize your friends nicely, the will change your future.

Reckless Anbandon

I woke this morning at 12 something. Fine, it's not morning. Afternoon. With closed window, my room really still in the morning mood. As I opened my eyes, there was no light to power my life. The 1st things i did was checking my phone for message from my beloved. Then, my laptop. Emails, comment and stuff. I opened the door. There was nobody at home. I text ralph, then he said he was with my siblings and cousins hanging around in town and my parents ware at the wedding party. OKAY. Around 3 o'clock. They were home. All of them. At 6 o'clock. Once again, i pulled the door. Oh! My boys and girls were at the beach while my parents were at the park, jogging. Ahah. OKU mane boleh join. It's okay. I'll be back, WORLD! Soon. Real soon.

Slowly dying

I've read a few of my friends' words bout their bad feeling with boys in their blogs and it made me realize, there's nothing perfect in this world. Even my own self. And I'm begging you guys. Just please, DON'T DIE. Don't kill your soul. Just don't even let it through your mind. Don't waste your time. It's okay to be sorrow, but, life is waiting. Waiting for you tomorrow. A better life than today. A better life than yesterday. A better life than me. When you wake up every morning, just give yourself a little harmless lie. Then the WORLD is yours.

Mother's day

I woke up this morning and watched tv. Almost every channel talk bout this 'mother's day' thing. And there's a few people call the tv station just to tell how their mom really means to them. Then, it gets me thinking, what would I said?

March 2004 - I broke my left wrist because of rugby game. My mom didn't allowed me to play after that. But after a year, I get back in the game. She never stopped me, but still hope that i will not broke my other hand.

Disember 2006 - I broke my right leg because of skateboard. My mom asked me to stop playing. But then, after a year, I'm back on my board. She never scolded me, but still allowed me to use her car to the skatepark.

March 2009 - My mom allow me to ride bikes. But, for sure, we can't see the future. I get hit by a stupid motherfucker driver with his fucking ugly car. (Bawak kancil takyah lah nak kecoh2 bawak laju2. Dah tak mampu beli kete laju, buat lah cara tak mampu). Then, when i was arrived at the hospital, there's nobody else in my mind, my MOM. After almost 10 miniutes she was there. Holding my hand with a pale and sad face. I almost cried, but my tears seems stuck in eyes. I whisper in her ears with a shaky voice, "my mom's friend was gone because of breast cancer a few weeks ago, luckly i still have my mom for me now". Then, she looked away, and I saw her eyes glowing. Then, here came the nurse and injected me with moffin.
When I woke up the next day, I can't move my body. Even my arms. I only could open my eyes. And she was there in front of me with her sad smile. Since then, she came everyday to the hospital to bath me and gave me hope.
Operation day. After the operation, here came the worst part. The pain. It was fucking hurt and it feels like hell. And I wonder if it was even close. I was sreaming and crying because of the pain. The only things that could make me feels better that time, was my mom. She hold my hand and wiped my tears. She never cried in front of me. It never happened. After a few days, i felt better. And my friend's mom, that was there beside my bed to take care of her son told me something. "MAK ENGKAU MENANGIS SETIAP KALI DIE TOLEH DAN KELUAR DARI WAD"

"I'm sorry MOM"

Virginty

I'm not a virgin anymore since i wrote this block.